Went for school guide cum A n F! Fun .. after that rush down to PRSS RC but they had ended .. sigh ... *saD* went for dinner with YC(max) and juanda at yoshi... Had a walk at TM just a chit chat walk i think...
THere we goes
On the way up to forth level
Max: Hey why u look so sianz?
Cyn: Haha , got meh ... no lar ...
outside sports connection(second level)
Max: Why u look so sianz?
Cyn: HuH?!? no lar where got ... still the same mah
Looking at Juanda
Cyn: I really look sianz meh?
Juanda: er m... ya ... ya ...
Cyn: oh iziT? i din realise lei !
After that we part off ... with max, ahead to our journey ... haha as usual ...
Cyn: Hey really? i look sianz aR? since when?
Juanda: Erm... ya lor .. recently lor .. i think ard monday ba ...
Cyn: izit ... sigh ...
When back to RC heard from Max that we are getting bronze this yr... bronze means ... means .. closure of CCA?!? i dunno ... but i am sad ... feeling real sad. Why must this happen to us? Full of memories and thoughts over there! Water bomb, Meetings, camp, traning, laughters, cries, sadness, etc etc. few yrs of hard work.. dun tell me this is going to close down just like that? anyway its not yet confirm so i am not going to say more here ... hahha
Oh ya went pasar malam just now and saw weiting and her oreo lor ... hit me so hard! aaRRgGgg!
Just dun understand how can a person change her mood and tone so fast? Are we still as a whole? questions after questions ... No one will be able to answer me ba except for myself. Have i changed again ? To another another person ... i thought i will be different when i get to meet with my other friends other then compared to them... but in fact i am serious wrong again ... i think they had influence me far too much ... i just dunno where the hell am i standing now ... this really can't go on ... really can't ... As what i saw on max's max nick : I like my new lifestyle, but i am not happy." this apply on me too.
In order to grab another opportunities, u have to forgone something else ... BUT i feel so so bad. When ever i told ppl on how i feel, what i face ard me. Similar console they gave me was : "Good what, you are sociable mah!" Somehow i thought izit wrong for me to be sociable... i'm tired ... tired of splitting myself up and entertaining everyone else ard me. Who will be ther entertain me and cheer me up when i am down?
I thought i am the only one feel this way... haha sadly to say they too think the same way bOohOo! haha why why why me? why us? why why? no one seems to care aby how we feel ... everyone seems to be living in their own perspective world onwards with thier own life . Sounds good ya .. but y can't i be just like them? i think i shall be just like that till i graduate ba ... changes and changes and changes ... i start to realise ... actually i just can't do anything just my myself ... wo de neng li you xian! yi jing dao da le ding duan!
Whats wrong with my life?!?
